Do Not Come When You Need Fixing

don’t come when you need fixing

don’t come when your heart is broken

and while it drowns in tears.

I am no angel. What about angels?

There are no wings that could make you soar

and fly you out of the darkness.

you have to give me up one day.

for I will leave you swimming in shadows of despair.

do not come when nails are not buried in your fractured bones

I am only a duck-taped pieces myself.

a walking hope of thin stitches.

My thread won’t hold your soul and head.

do not come when you need fixing.

I age with the moon, it appears and go every time and what’s left would be

the gravity and the grace that the tides obey.

I am a sunset.

I do not rise at all.

I look beyond and stare blankly at the edge of the world.

I am an otherness and careless selfish pride.

While I stumble in fear.

I cry for the times I was blind.

I wouldn’t see you.

You’d be left at the gutters.

I’d be rotting in hell.

And even the searchlights in the parking lots of hell

would not lead me all the way down.

Come though, for the midnight drinks,

the smoke and the music engorgement

of swollen indie songs and piano dreams.

like when violins cast a soulful melody I couldn’t understand.

Come though, for I have aspirins and xanax in my pockets.

we can gulp the atrocity

and face the ghosts.